Thursday 8 November 2018

Spewing Rainbows and Shit....Just Read!




It is really late and I have work tomorrow, but it is important that I share with you what has been keeping me up at night. I had thought I wanted to do something grand and big with this space, but within this search of this great big "take over the cyber world" idea for this blog, I forgot that it was a space to write and share. So yeah I will share ...Take it back to basics

I recently broke into my 27-year-old self. I will tell you guys about him: He is more difficult and driven but I would not want him to be any other way! There are times he keeps me up at night because he keeps on replaying the moments during the day when he lost his truth...Did I tell you guys he is obsessed with HIS TRUTH!  He smiles less and tends to have a just achieved "R-B-F"(Resting Bitch Face), I can only gather it's cause he is focused on mending and retaining the light that he has but life seems to relentlessly wrestle's him out of. Did I mention he does not lose, not even to this life thing, I saw him rebuild and rise like he never experienced the tragedy of those Trojan horses, his walls might have fallen but they never stayed down cause HE NEVER LOOSES! He will tell you more though?

Now how did I get here? I think it was his relentless search for truth. I have over the years been on a journey to 'self ' and through this journey, I met really good friends along the way. These friends included and not limited to Heartbreak, Love, God, Gay, Politics, Black, Money, Depression, Happiness, Sex, Career, Changes...This became the circle of friends who packed their overnight bags for a sleepover and never left my apartment. I see some more regularly than others, some I have strained relationships with others I keep a peculiar distance from for obvious reasons!

I struggled to find spaces where people who looked like me, dated like me and more than anything who represented me, had existed and I would be able to find the tools I needed to manage my new found friends. It sort of seems like someone had sworn the "Gay's" to a secret vow of  'I have my shit together and I am fabulous all day every day daaaahling, now look at me achieve'! 

So dear reader (Lol there is a huge part of me that prays you are a Gay Feminine Black Boy, but I am smart enough to know that is not the case !) I hope you will have me every 2 Weeks in this space as we will be meeting my close circle of friends that I have mentioned above. More than anything I am excited for you to meet the 27-year-old "Him" I told you guys about. I myself am still so excited about him and all the magic he is introducing me to.  I have a feeling our first "Hang-Out" will be with my dear friend that we all have met and are sort of acquainted with(some more than other's ) ...SEX!

Saturday 7 July 2018

Eventually we will come back

It's weird even trying to write this over due apology...I have been struggling with this space, mainly the trajectory I want it to take.It took me going to the readers statistic pages and seeing all of the thousands of visits/reads this space received.

Right now I know one thing for sure is that when it is time for this space to come back- to both my life and yours (If you will have me), I want you and I to let it be beautiful.

After a year or two of weekends sipped away over numerous glasses of wine and over creamed pasta's spent on a side walk table of an Italian restaurant recently discovered , I think now know I want to strip it down. I want to invite both myself and you as we go about deconstructing and reconstructing all that is life.